Monday, April 28, 2008

"It's Girl Scout Cookie Time!"--I Don't Get It

Why are girl scout cookies seasonal? It's not like they require a certain fresh berry or the birth of a young fish to be made. Don't the girl scouts want/need money all the time? I can't name a single person who wouldn't buy girl scout cookies regularly.

But no. They only sell them once, maybe twice a year. Forcing me to buy 10 boxes of thin mints and just as many tag-a-longs to "last me through the year."

Yeah. Fucking. Right. All that really does is allow me to eat a sleeve, NAY! a BOX of cookies a day.

I don't get it.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Catsicles--I don't get it.

My cats have figured out how to open my freezer. I walk in the kitchen and one of them will be sitting in the freezer with the door wide open. No. Seriously.

How did they figure this out?

How long has this been going on?

WHY would they want to sit in the freezer?

Do you think my crabcakes are still ok to eat?

I don't get it.

p.s. this is not very eco-friendly.

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Stuff That I Don't Get

All of my blog friends are clever and/or uber-intelligent. Kudos to them, but I have neither the time nor the inclination to keep up with the Jones'. In fact, today I'll be starting a series that focuses on quite the opposite of being in the know. This series is entitled, Stuff I Don't Get.
Yep. That's about the gist of it. I'll simply mention something I don't get and invite my reader to help me to understand.

Welcome to my first installment of Stuff That I Don't Get

Today’s stuff that I don't get asks the question, “Why don't cabs have cup holders?” Now I can't speak for all cab riders, but in the morning I often have a drink in hand. Usually coffee. I trust I'm not the only morning commuter who thinks that coffee/tea/juice is a lovely way to begin the day, and in their time crunch is often forced to bring it along. It all goes well until it's time to pay. To get out my wallet and to remove the money from my wallet...and then put my change back in my wallet. Now, as my job (like many of us) requires business casual I am wary of squeezing my coffee between my knees while I cash handle. Yes, the travel mug is SUPPOSED to be spill/splash proof, but I've had my days and I'm not all about having another one 30 seconds before I walk into my office. The process stresses me out EVERYTIME. So here it is...here is my question: Why don't cabs have cup holders? I don't get it.

Sunday, April 13, 2008

TAGGED

Alright. I'm going two birds with one stone on this, since both fannie (http://fanniesroom.blogspot.com/) and brita (http://brita05.blogspot.com/) tagged me. At this point I'm just having a damn axiety attack about getting it done so here goes...

The rules:
1. Pick up the nearest book of 123 (or more) pages.

BLOODTHIRSTY BITCHES AND PIOUS PIMPS OF POWER (fannie loaned it to me so that automatically makes me look smart)

2. Open the book to page 123 and find the 5th sentence.

"It all makes sense to him."


3. Post the next 3 sentences

"Team hate is smarter than it is intelligent. The unfunny antics of Coulter are remarkable only because they are intentionally outrageous, tasteless fabrications that evoke anger--which pays. Ingraham reminds me of a child swinging blindly at a pinata and constantly missing."


Ok, I hope that this has proven to all of you a few things. #1. I know how to read. #2. I'm really, really smart and political and crap. And C. #1 and #2 only really happen with the help of Fannie.

I guess I'm supposed to tag other people...but I don't really have a lot of blog friends (most of my friends are really stupid ((and ugly)). That's why I hang out with them. I'm the smart and pretty one). Since I've been double tagged I'm going to tag Garvey (http://www.melissasuegarvey.blogspot.com/) and um...hmm...well since fannie has likely read 15-20 books this past week I'll tag her. Don't tag me back bitches.

*NOTE: Where I come from to "tag" someone is to have sex with them. Just sayin'.